Scribe Takeover #10

Are we up to #10 already? It may be more but my husband Scribe deleted his entire "Documenting" blog and restarted a new one called Scribe Professional-The Morning After...Thank goodness I snatched so many of his pieces!

If Anyone is ever wondering how my husband feels about me, feels about being married to me, or feels about being the man in my household...You can read it for yourself. And please remember...I DON'T HAVE TO SHARE HIM WITH ANYBODY! Except for my kids and his momma (You know who this reference is for...I'm glad you're still reading...maybe you'll learn something!)

MY WIFE DJ DIVA-

I've been a cad....Its been too long since I wrote anything of substance in appreciation of my wife DJ Diva--how foolish. Surely by now she must think I have lost something for her. Maybe somehow her words no longer move me. Or maybe her allure has faded in some way. Perhaps she thinks her kisses aren't as sweet, her touch no longer raises my..um....arm hair, yeah, arm hair....or maybe I'm just getting used to her. The answer is no to all of the above.

My wife is my everything. Everything.She's the woman I look forward to at all times. She's the woman whose honor I want to protect. She's the woman I look for in my sleep. She's the woman I lean on in times of despair and the woman I want to impress above all others. There are days I stare at her sleeping gently (Shut up, I know what you're thinkin') and I am amazed how far we have come together in such a short period of time. Through it all, we stared at each other, said "I love you" and moved forward. Real love. I have the kind of love you can't buy, reproduce or fake. You can't produce it with sex alone. You can't entice it with a hot car (unless its a red corvette...damn u Prince!).

My wife looks at me and knows me sometimes better than I know myself. They say women are like that, but none of the women I've been with have been this in tune with what makes me tick. My wife knows me, and she still hasn't fled....glutton for punishment I think....lol. I don't deserve her and that's why I work so hard to keep her. You know, I look at her in royal terms and some have said that I am just plain whipped...perhaps. YAYYYYY TO BEING WHIPPED! Cause I get "it" when I ask and whenever she wants "it". I never feel cheated emotionally in this union. I never feel like there isn't anything my wife wouldn't do for me. My only hope is that she knows that there isn't anything I wouldn't give her. I hope she knows that whats mine is hers and she can bet the house on that. I hope she knows that she is the sexiest fucking woman I have ever been with. I hope she knows that I dream daily about Juicy and the Girls...some of my dreams are wet, others are during the day.

She's one of the few women I've met who would be justified in being a total, complete, snob. Sort of like, um, me....lol. But she's way more down to Earth than I'll ever be. I'm so high-brow the stick in my ass has started to install insulation. But Diva is the life of our home. She is the party, she is the dance, she is the songs. She is the queen and the leader. She is the hell-raiser and the peacemaker. She works hard and expects the same from you. She earns respect simply by being who she is, which cannot be said for so many people I come across. My wife is dynamic. She's a hell of a writer and lord knows I wish she would just write 100 pages of something hot to shut alot mutherfuckers up and put them to shame. She's an innovator and she does it all with positivity and drive. Its a hell of a thing to watch and experience.(Bolding added by Diva)

Because of my wife I am...

Living in Stone Mountain, GA

Working at a HBCU in a position I love

A Father

A Husband

One happy Black man.

I cherish my wife. Sometimes when some of her old flames call (I hate these calls...lame...as my daughter would say) with all that "How you doin'" ish, I get tight. First of all, Negro, you had your time to say all you needed to, now she gone, and here you are calling years later cause in the immortal words of Biggie, "You want that old thing back". Nah Negro. See...this is what happens when Negros think they pimps and then they realize they're not...they just got lucky. I've never had any such delusions. I never wanted to have Diva...I wanted to KEEP her from Day 1. She continues to be the illumination in my life. An angel sent to me to set and keep me straight. I am so grateful and so lucky to be married. With the way people talk about their wives and husbands I wonder if I'll ever be so disenchanted. I can't imagine that ever happening. I love my wife more than anything. I need my wife more than anything.So no, the allure has not faded. No, I am not falling out of love, or have forgotten what she means to me. I am basking in her prescence in my life. Sometimes its enough to just hold her in her sleep. Sometimes its enough to just know she's there.But um tonight....I got an appointment with Juicy! You hear me Diva?!? I may even bring a napkin.

I love you Diva, you can put that on everything. -Daddy

All I want for Christmas/Scribe Takeover

Hey everybody...I been crazy busy...interviewing for T.ea.ch A.mer.ica and trying to get this move coordinated for the middle of February...yeah...me and Scribe and the kids are out of here...and earlier than previously stated...

Can I just say that I love my man....Scribe is the absolute best man I could ever find for me and my kids....I know...I know...you sick of hearing it....but when I had bad shit going on...that's all I talked about....

Now all I want to talk about is the joy of having found my otherself and having been with him for 7 months...but....i have another spot for that....

But I'll let Scribe takeover for today:


“Call it a clan, call it a network, call it a tribe, call it a family: Whatever you call it, whoever you are, you need one.”
-Jane Howard


Its Christmas time in New York! This is my favorite time of the year here. It’s the part of New York that I’m going to miss the most when I move south (or wherever the hell T.ea.ch Am.er.ic.a says we're moving…: ). I’ve been to other cities all around the country some may be more picturesque (Colorado Springs), some more traditional (New Orleans), but I really can’t imagine any city in the union being anymore uplifting and exciting than it is here during the holidays. The best gifts in my life seem to come without any holiday or occasion. This year has sort of been the exception. On Cinco de Mayo, I met Diva in person for the first time, we dove into a Spanish Karaoke bar in the Bronx, she broke down all my insecurities in one night and life hasn’t been the same since to say the least. Her brother asked me once, how did I tame her? I gave him a lot of words but what I should have said was, “I didn’t tame her at all!”. I’ve said it once and I’ll say it again, “You simply don’t trap butterflies!” I’ve tried to make myself the most comfortable nourishing flower in the field and Diva has found me worthy enough to stay perched on...does that make sense? Seriously, Diva has been incredibly accepting of all the ish that comes with being with me. She has clearly been the best gift of all the gifts I’ve ever received in any year on any day!

Well, here it is the holiday season and for the first time in my life I have children in my life to share Christmas with. Before I get to that, I think I need to reveal that as a child my Christmas’ in a word….sucked. I’ll save you the sob story, but honestly, I rarely got anything I wanted or much at all. All I can say is that the 80’s were hard on my family. My 1st niece was born December 23, 1991 and with that came the re-birth of my Christmas spirit. I took my newborn niece everywhere I could. Everywhere Christmas was being celebrated, I wanted her to be there. Even if she could barely open her eyes…lol. Now, each holiday season, I want to hear the carols, I want to smell the cookies baking, I want to see the lights on the bushes and windows of houses, and the elaborate displays in the store windows on 5th Avenue. I want hot apple cider from Starbucks, and I absolutely must watch Miracle on 34th Street (the 1940’s version) sometime between December 1st and December 24th. I want a tree that smells like it just got chopped down and drug in from Everwood forest and a mistletoe hung over my front door. And will somebody please buy some egg nog and spike that ish for me. Is that asking too much? Yeah it is. But each year I try to get all of that in before the 25th because to me that’s tradition. I don’t know but it seems each year it becomes fashionable to hate on the holidays. I always said to myself, my kids, should I had any of my own, would remember Christmas fondly and vividly. They will take the traditions followed by their parents and share them with their own children…at least that’s what I hope happens. Is that too um….Caucasian? corny? What can I tell you…Scribe loves the kids.

So it was this past weekend that I took my girls (the twins) out ice-skating at Wollman Rink in Central Park. (Mommy DJ Diva stayed home and played Tiger Woods PGA Golf on Xbox) It was their first time ever and they loved it. I say I took them ice-skating, but really it was more “ice-falling”, the twins are big for their age and well lets just say they have the coordination of a newborn fawn. I have never in my life seen two kids have that much fun hurting themselves in my life. I tried to convince them that I didn’t want them to hurt themselves falling and that we should leave early, but they were having none of it. They did not like seeing everybody flying around the ice and they had to play the wall. They were determined to stay until they got it, and well they almost did…two more times and we’ll have two Peggy Flemings on our hands. What I love about these kids is that when they get challenged, they get mad, but the anger doesn’t stop them…it makes them more determined. They get that ..I’m sure.. from their mother…if fact I’m positive that’s where they get it from.(He's right...DJ does not accept failure!) We then trekked around the park awhile, then down 5th avenue to see the lights on the buildings, the coolest one being the one with the huge snowflakes that light up one at a time and then all together…they couldn’t stop counting the snowflakes. Finally, I busted through the throng of people and made it to Rockefeller Center to see the Christmas tree. One of them says to me, “We should take that tree home.” Everything we did that day was a first for them and that was perhaps the thing that made the day that much more special. When you see a child’s face light up with excitement and wonder….makes you proud, if not a little misty.

I’m not sure what I’m getting for Christmas, but even if I get nothing, my holiday season has been made. I shared, and continue to share this season with the three people I’m most thankful for. Diva says to me the othernight, “I hope I do enough for you.” My Love listen, you’ve given me the gift of your family and charged me with being the leader of it. That’s all a man really can ask for. Enjoy this holiday season, share it liberally with your family, cast out your inner-scrooge, and have some hot apple cider…I’m telling you the stuff is good for the soul.

Merry Christmas! Enjoy!

Scribe's 5th Takeover/ 6mts and counting!

Yeah...That's me right there....I went out this weekend and decided to take pictures with my new (old) weave....


DJaying...

So all you haters...who say I don't deserve the name DJ...

You know what you can do....

Besa mi culo!

yeah...I'm Dominican too...

My wonderful Man SCRIBE has written another post that I decided to jack from him.... I cannot believe how blessed I am to have a man like him....the rest were def all appetizers...this man is a full meal.....that keeps me satisfied....



I was asked a few months back by ladybug...if I ever cried because I loved someone.



I have cried because I was hurt by someone....but never because I loved them too much...



Now I can answer that question in the affirmative....

So in honor of our 6 months together....

May I present....



SCRIBE'S 5th Takeover!!!!!!


Six Months and The Love Continues....








Its time for another sickeningly sweet post for the most wonderful woman a schlep like me could ever have. With a face like this its amazing that I can attract a cold let alone an eleven piece like my lovely Diva. We've been together six months now...can you believe it??? Six months...that's 180 days, 24 weeks, 4,320 hours...okay you get the point. In that time we've been challenged in so many ways and each time the experience has done nothing to weaken our resolve to stay in love, and stay together. In that time I've learned a few things too...

WHAT I'VE LEARNED

1. Do not come in the room talking all loud when the following is on: Grey's Anatomy, ER, The Wire, the sunday morning show on 98.7 Kiss, or America's Next Top Model...I'm sure I forgot something. Point is...shut the hell up when she's watching one of her favorite shows. Learned that one the hard way.

2. Massages, baths drawn, flowers, cooking, cleaning, and all other expressions of love are not only appreciated, but are well, well rewarded. You just can't go wrong by doing any of these things. Note to the fellas: Its okay...give her all you can you just might be surprised what you get in return.

3. There is absolutely nothing better than having your woman walk into a room and every man in the joint is drooling over her and she walks out with you. My man, that ish makes you feel very, very big.

4. When ordering out her faves are: General Tso's Chicken with French Fries, Cheeseburger with Mayo and Ketchup, or Bacon Egg and Cheese with a litlle bit of grape jelly. If you truly love the Diva, you will not forget this.
Wait! I have to kill you, you might use this to get in her good graces....especially that fan club she's got in the mailroom. Don't think I don't know! I WILL come up to that piece in a robe and some flip flops and go Rambo! I love my Diva Yo!

Seriously, I have one incredible woman. She came into my life at a time when I was together, but not whole. In her own way...she made me just that. You will often find me diddy-bopping through Harlem happily on my way home to my Diva. So much so my family has begun to believe I've abandonded them. It is staggering sometimes how supportive, kind, and giving she is. She is my iron fist in a velvet glove and for that I am thankful. I've learned that she is a teammate and clearly puts god's words in her actions and deeds. I've learned that we can both be incredibly lazy and incredibly productive in the same day. I've learned that we can argue without putting each other down. I've learned that I'm not perfect and more often than not...wrong. But you know what? I still get called Daddy aftwards! That's love. And you can't fake that. Its real.

This weekend, my job had a benefit gospel concert which I co-organized. That morning I really wanted her to come, but I knew that she was extra tired from the week and so when you wanted to take a rain check I was disappointed but not hurt. It was much to my surprise when she called me to tell me she was 10 minutes away and was coming. When she showed up...See What I learned #3 But not only that, you ever had someone emabarass the ish out of you cause they lacked tact and class? My Diva looked classy, talked classy and my co-workers were not only impressed but had lots to say this Monday morning to me about her and how nice she was. But I already knew that.



If you notice I haven't mentioned the twins. Well that's because two reasons 1. I'm always giving it up to the twins and 2. This post is for my Diva. The future mother of my child. My future wife. The woman I'm not sure how I made it this far without. The woman I hope to never be without. This is for the woman that works 5 sometimes 6 days a week, comes home, provides love for her entire family, and maintains her Diva throughout it all. This is for the woman who believes I'm the one with the most patience...when I know its her...she's gotta deal with me...that shit takes patience. This is for the sexiest woman with the meanest ass that never gets past me with a good "smack that".





I love you girl with everything. And I hope in these six months I've lived up to everything I said I would. I told you I was gonna work hard for you, I told you that I would be loyal, and I would always put you first. I pray I've done that, because you've been worth that and so, so much more.

I fell in love again for like 30th time in this relationship and you know what???? It never gets old.
Have a blessed day y'all.

Scribe's 4th Takeover (Yes She's Mine)

ok I'm shameless....I can't help it...He loves me and I love him....

Oh Yes She's Mine

I have been a sensitive, emotional mess these last few weeks. Do men PMS? Okay that sounds kind of um..."happy" Still. It really is time to take off the dress, kill the waterworks, and stop the tea party. I'm a man after all and men "man up". Yesterday, the world as one comedian said, tapped me on the shoulder and said..."Hey its me, the world, and you're gonna cry today." So after I let loose on the Staten Island Ferry, I realized all the great things about my life, and how much love I'm getting from home. I'm blessed y'all so blessed.

The Twins.

T & T started the first full week of school this week. Diva and I take turns each night reading to them for at least a half-hour. When a child reads one day, and then reads better two days later, and then even better a day later, you feel so proud. Diva got them "Judy Blume" books to read on their own. I usually read Arthur or Disney tales. THEY LOVE IT. You have to remember that I've never had children embrace me like these two girls. When I walk through the door they bumrush me. When I tell them something, they listen and respond. One a little slower than the other, but they respond nonetheless. The credit must be given to their mother. She ensures that they know that they must listen to me. And I think I do a good job of getting them to trust me not tell them anything wrong. My ex-wife used to take delight in seeing me struggle with her boys, that's why I started whooping ass. You laugh, but it worked. After a couple of bathroom sessions with the shower on...I'd say jump to one of them, not realizing they were already in the air!

Diva is the disciplinarian and she don't play. I'm the softie, but I make sure I don't make her the "bad guy" Like I said before, "I giveth plenty, and I taketh away swiftly" When we decide to discipline they know that not only do I agree with the discipline but I'm partially responsible for it. When they came home, we laid down some new rules to them. And together we both let them know...this school year...we're not tolerating any lack of interest in education. None. So they know, Scribe is nice, but he aint playing. You will learn.

The other day, I watched Diva reading to them and having such a good time, I walked over and whispered in her ear "I'm proud of you" She loved that. I was too, so many parents are too tired or too something to take time out for their children. Diva and I are usually exhausted after work, but we push it because we know how important it is. I've agreed to escort them to the babysitter in the morning before catching the bus to work. Its a short walk but one I've begun to look forward to. I start the walk with one question..."Okay...who's the smartest 3rd graders ever?" Response. "We are." Maybe there is something to this encouragement thing. If there are two more encouraged people I'd like to meet them, because these girls don't know the word can't. When they can't do something, they get mad and keep trying...I love that, I absolutely love that. Who do you think that comes from?...it damn sure ain't me. I just got here. Its Diva. Diva doesn't allow them to quit on themselves. Even if it means letting them have it verbally, they know they are capable. She often asks me "am I too hard on them" my answer is always "No." We live in a neighborhood, where kids lose hope at ,10 years of life. "No." We live in a neighborhood, where girls get pregnant at 16. "No" We live in a neighborhood where boys "get in that ass" at 13..."No!" My thinking is that the world will be harder on them then she can ever be. They need the discipline and love that only a mother can give to her daughter. I am proud to say, Diva is a great a$$ mother. Me? I'm just going along for the ride and enjoying every minute. These girls are gonna be special, they already are and I'm going to be around when they blossom and achieve their full-potential.

RECOGNITION

It is a credit to Diva that she sees the the "quiet strength" in me. I'm not very intimidating, amiable to a fault sometimes, 6"2', light skinned and 170lbs...not exactly Ray Lewis of the Baltimore Ravens okay. Nor do I want to be. I love who I am and how I rock. Some women, sadly, have taken that the wrong way...thinking they can just walk all over me. Nah man...Scribe don't play that punk sh*t. I've cut women off and deaded them forever for playing me soft. But I never have to defend my manhood, nor is it ever questioned. In fact, Diva has really made me even stronger as a person. She constantly tells me how happy she is to have a "real man" in the house. She always shows appreciation for even the little things. Even the things I "should" do.

She sees that "manhood" isn't about intimidation, its about having the fortitude to stand, provide, and deliver. Its also about sacrificing your wants for the needs of your family. I've been trying to get someone to love me like that for I don't know how long. For the last 4 months, I've had that person.

When I first laid eyes on Diva, I said to myself, "I'm keeping her." Some how, some way she's gonna be mine. That was Day 1. We are on month 4 and she's mine...Oh yes she's mine. And I'm so proud. There is a God. There really is. Be blessed today. I am.

I love you Diva!

-Scribe

Scribe's 3rd Takeover (His take on Tyrone my cat)

You know...you guys are missing out if you don't read him...he is an extrordinary writer with great insight and humor infused in his subjects....And I ain't saying that just because I love him!!! LOL

I am not Diva's man.

Tyrone is.

I'll start from the beginning.

I knew Tyrone and me were going to have problems the first time we met. He sauntered over, rubbed his head and body on my legs, lured me to pet him, and bit me. That's the cat equivalent of a sucker punch.

The beef was on.

I couldn't understand why he didn't like me. I had always been friendly to cats...some of my best friends are cats. Ask Tiger or Gotham...I treated them like family. Hell, even SupposedToBe...yeah I named him SupposedToBe...he was my very first cat...he was supposed to be a Dog. SupposedToBe loved me to death. But Tyrone? Nah man. This feline saw me as one of those "Johnny Come Slide In Negroes" I'm always warning Diva about.

You know the ones.....

Happily Involved Girlfriend: "My boyfriend doesn't like poetry, I read him a poem and he didn't even understand it."
JCSIN: "Oh, he doesn't like poetry?....I LOVE poetry...I write it all the time."

Next thing you hear...

"Ancient powers of evil...transform my broke..lame...ass...to Langston Huuuuughes!
(Oh like you didn't watch Thundercats...you didn't?...damn that's messed up.)

Sorry, got sidetracked...stay with me.

I had come into Tyrone's home, taken his girl, and then rubbed it in by reducing him to voyeur status. He was pissed and he was not going to take this lying down.

TYRONE'S ACTS OF REVENGE (the short list)

1. Out of the six possible places Diva and I store our clothes, I occupy 2, Tyrone has slept in both.

2. One day I'm walking past the bathroom, the door is open (kids on vacation...Hi Girls!...I miss you two sooooo much...wait until you two see your room!)...sorry...Okay, so I'm walking past the bathroom, Diva is showering and who has their ass hanging out of the shower curtain and their head all in it just visually molesting the Diva????...Tyrone. I THOUGHT CATS HATED WATER!!! No respect.

3. Take a cheese grater...now briskly rub it on the top of your hand...that's Tyrone's tounge you're feeling. I know this because this how he chose to wake me at about 3 a.m. in the morning.

4. I have a number of light colored suits. Tyrone doesn't like those. He likes the ones where his hair is sure to show up the most prominent. This is why he continually rubs his body on my pant leg...RIGHT BEFORE I'M LEAVING FOR WORK!!!!!

He has committed more acts of disrespect towards me than anything you feed and give water to should. I decided that the only way to calm this dude down was to break him down and rebuild him ala Steve Alston.

First things first....Ass whooping. Look...spare the rod, spoil the cat okay? It wasn't even like I planned it. One day he bit one of the twins, she came and told me and I was like, "Oh now you're bugging the f*ck out!" It wasn't even a "bite", more like a love-snap...still. I wore that ass out in the Bathroom (no yelling, no protection from Diva, just me and him in the box). I thought after that we'd have a new cat...we don't...we have a more determined cat. Tyrone has reverted to pining for pity to get love. I'm sure you all know Tyrone is "fixed"...nope...no cajones (No nuts for a cat who's behavior suggests he has a pair the size of baseballs!). He knows Diva feels a little bad about it, I mean as a man, the jewels are mucho important and are not permitted to disappear for any length of time. Tyrone will come into the room, lay flat on his back, cock both of his hindlegs open...to reveal an empty crotch where cajones once frolicked about. This is his way of saying..."LOOK, LOOK WHAT YOU'VE DONE TO ME....MEEEEEEE)...what a con-artist! On cue, Diva will go, "awwwww, I'm sorry baby" and then grab him up and begin to speak to him in what I've termed the "cat language".

Its unintelligible to everyone else but her and Tyrone...awwooukemensuknowmommylubsyou.....its disgusting.

So I'm at a loss now. Still getting hair all over my ish. Still getting ran up on in the middle of the night with little swipes to the ankles. Still getting no respect.

I give up.

Tyrone you win.

Diva is yours.

Yeah I'm now 4th on the depth chart, but every now and then, when Diva isn't looking...I put my foot dead in his ass...just to remind him I'm still the boss....

He doesn't get tight though...he's a playa...game recognize game.

Seriously, I love the ol' furball. Still want a dog. Have a good day!

Scribe's Takeover Part 2 / Memphis Bummin'

I am leaving tomorrow to help my parents close on their house in Memphis and to take the twins to Memphis so that their father (my ex-husband) will pick them up and spend the rest of the summer with them in ATL. I am also going to survey the new neighborhood(s) Scribe and I will moving to by December. I need to pick up applications for the both of us for the University of Memphis and also narrow down my three choices for a wedding dress and put them (mine and the twins) on layaway (yes I believe in laying ish away). C has a bunch of wedding ideas ...and we will begin my wedding planner notebook together. I will be extra busy....

But

I love my boyfriend and these are his words.

MEMPHIS BUMMIN'

5 a.m. Tommorrow - Diva leaves for Memphis, TN

She's taking the kids.

I'm bummin.

For the last 2.5 months I have had the pleasure of being the male presence in the lives of Diva's children. We have gone to Dorney Park, to Bear Mountain park, to various barbecues, and pools. We have eaten ice cream way before breakfast, taken saturday morning trips to Mickey D's, danced to hip hop, watched cartoons..(The "X's" is dope. "Cars" was...aiight). While my time with the twins has been short, it has been amazingly fulfulling. I guess I just didn't figure they would actually accept me so easily. I don't why I felt that way either, I work for the welfare of children. As a foster child I had the experience of living both in the Good Times household, and the Cosby show household.

(I've often thought of Bill when dealing with the children....WWBD...What Would Bill Do??).

I think what the twins see in me is patience. I don't raise my voice, I am not condescending, and I'm not distant. I believe in the give and take approach: I giveth plenty...should you exhibit a pattern of unacceptable behavior...I taketh away quickly. I have gotten peeved when I thought they were behaving as children sometimes do...spoiled. But even then I always go back to one single important factor...They're 7.

They are going to be with their natural father. That's a good thing. Children need their fathers. I was asked if I was jealous about that...are you kidding??? I wish I could visit my father, I wish I could just say 'Hi, I'm Scribe." "Dad, what do you think Eli's gonna be like this year?"...anything. See, mine died when I was a year old. He was hit by "D" train on 167th Street, in the Bronx. Jealous? Nah. A little envious maybe.

Actually, what I explained to the both of them was that:

1. I was not there to replace their father

2. It was okay to call me by my first name

3. I would never harm them, so they needn't be afraid of me.

4. They could trust me as much as their mother does.

Oh, and that I plan to be the coolest step-pops ever. What! No seriously. I try to encourage them, but I need to do a better job at that. Diva has warned that there is a disconnect between step-parents and step-children. Biology has a lot to do with that disconnect. So one of things I said I was going to do was encourage reading alot more than I have. I've bought books, but when the school year hits, I'd like to have a nice little library for them.

I've tried in these months to treat the children to a guy who really loves the idea and practice of parenting. I have none of my own. I will say this, if I did have twins or any of my own...they'd never have to travel far to get to me...I'd never leave them....never. I once thought I'd be a single father, adopt on my own, but Diva has all but killed that idea. She wants boys...twins. (uh.. I didn't say all that lol) Whoa. I'm wit' it though.

Diva will be back on Monday(uh sorry baby Tuesday)...no...no parties at Scribe's house. I shall be working, Flipping between CNN and ESPN, getting some much needed sleep, and maybe if its not 1 billion degrees out, catch a Yankee game at the stadium. I love the three newest women in my life. It is a love that is growing daily. A love I hope never stops growing. I hope you all join me in praying for their safe delivery. I hope you all join me in praying that the twins have a wonderful experience, I hope you all join me in praying that Diva is successful in her efforts which are indeed of much importance.

Yeah I'm bummin' a little but I'll be alright.

Scribe's Takeover

Ok...it's been a month since Scribe and I met. I was going to write my update last night but I found out he had done it already on his blog. His update is so sincere...and I know he means it....I'ma post it on mine because...well because I want to LOL....

Scribe is the kind of man I wanted....

Fly you for free down to Florida because he can't do without you-Man

The wake you up early just he can snuggle with you- Man

Go to store and get everything you need just as you asked for it-Man

Doesn't want to come over late at night through the backdoor in my bedroom but would rather come at a decent hour to be of some assistance when I get home from a 9 hour workday and a 3 hour commute and have to do a million things with the children-Man

Gives you money to keep in your house in case you need anything- Man

Is never afraid to express himself-Man

I could go on and on...but I'm sure that maybe Ms. Tee knows what I mean...or maybe The Muse...Jamie has one of those type of men....and I'm sure Sarcasstik and DP are those types of men.

It may be early...I understand that....It's only been 6 months since the twins were last in contact with a man I was involved with...and that was totally my fault. But before that? 2 years...Believe me...they were wondering if something was wrong with their mommy LOL....

Bottom line is I'm a package deal. One of the things that made me break-up with Raw for good was the twins expressing themselves that Raw was there for me and not for them...That hurt. As a result, I did not introduce them to anyone who I didn't feel was worthy. The Lion never met my kids. Honey was able to be around them because he had past experience. Ok so we just went back over 5 years of my life.

Scribe wants the package...not just the milk. And from what he has told me about his marriage...I know that it's not hard for him to accept the fact that I have two children. Shoot he was raising 4. And none were his.

Now I am seeing Scribe....and I don't plan on stopping. This is causing alarm. It can't be helped now. But when I come back from Orlando...it will all be stopped...I am nipping all kinds of mess in the bud...

When you read this man's words....please know that I have heard them straight from his lips...and I have seen them in his actions...therein lies the difference...

Here's the Scribe takeover:

Alone in Orlando

Just got into Orlando today, woke up this morning dreading my flight (which my ears are still recovering from.).. I’m not afraid of flying, I just didn’t want to leave Diva and the kids. I feel like I just got a little closer to the kids (one of them told me they didn’t want me to leave…it took everything in me not to break down…I’m kinda sensitive when it come to love from kids…), she and I have been enjoying the hell out of each other, and now I’m leaving them all for a week. That sucks. But Diva will be here on Wednesday (YES!!!). In the cab ride to the airport I broke down and cried. I feel like my life really is moving forward at a pace I have not experienced before. I feel like I’m progressing in my life in a way I have not experienced. You ever felt something so good you never wanted it to end. And it made you feel, stronger, happier, and frightened all at the same time? That’s my life right now. It feels so good.

I took a stand at my other job just to make it to this conference. The Harlem foster care agency where I work implements a system of usury on its employees. It’s the kind of place that you could work 20 years for and be lucky if you got a certificate of recognition. Sometimes you have to make choices. Basically, they will bleed you until you have nothing left. The choice I made to come here came at a little bit of a price. But I’m willing to pay that price because the opportunities that may arise from this conference offer a great return. So I’m praying I’m able to network with the right people. At the very least I want my boss/mentor/friend to be proud of the job we did as a team in making this conference successful.

Diva prayed with me before I left. She prayed for my safety. She prayed for my success. Now I want to pray for her:

Lord please protect my baby. Please keep her in your loving hands. Please protect the twins and keep them secure. Please keep her secure in my love. Please deliver her safely to me here in Florida.

I have to do something to impress on Diva’s family that I am not a typical negro. At the same time, I want them to know that I am not here to take from Diva. I am not here to hurt Diva. I am not with her to gain access to her insight. I’m here because she treats me like a man should be treated. I know its early, but I really want them to see the level of dedication I have for this family. For a man who values love and family as much as I do, I fight the urge to scream…CAN’T YOU SEE HOW MUCH I LOVE THIS WOMAN AND HER FAMILY!!! But of course, they can’t, because, in truth, they don’t know me.

She and I believe that time will be our best friend... I’m praying that it will be theirs too. I have to break the habit of believing that people trust as easily as I do. It really doesn’t happen like that with most people. My problem is that I get pissed when someone takes me as disingenuous. I’m 33. The days of me running around conquering as much pussy as I can are o-v-e-r. I want one woman to dedicate my time, effort and love to.

You know her as DJ Diva, for me she so much more than that. To me, she represents promise, prayers answered, the upliftment of my spirit….please….I could go on for paragraphs. Lord, please impress upon Diva’s friends and family…

I am not…

Shiftless, scandalous, or trifling. I am not typical, lazy, bitter, judgmental, or a liar. I am not a cheater, wife-beater, or possessive (um…hold up….nigga, if you holla at my girl on some “can we talk” shit…I’ll fuck you up…straight music.) Nope. Not playing.

I am…

A strong black man, god fearing, in need of lots of love, dedicated to working, dedicated to Diva and family, sensitive to being misjudged, loving, kind, considerate, not perfect.

Back to the conference…….We set up tomorrow…lots of work to do. Tuesday the students arrive, my man is greeting them. He’s open about that...he plans to slay a whole campus full of women before we leave here….

Me?....I’m just looking forward to Wednesday!.....: )

(I'm looking forward to Wednesday too baby!)