Sunday, December 31, 2006

It is a Happy New Year...ain't it?

First let me say thank yall for your well wishes on our engagement. Let me tell you...there were alot of times where your comments throughout this last year kept us hopeful that those around us...would accept us like yall did.

I want to say thank you, thank you, thank you...and teardrops fall as I write this. When I declared our love and intents...yall never wavered...never saw it for what it was....and I will never forget any of yalls support. My family may nor understand my affinity for blogging....but I know I have met some truly wonderful people all over the country...and to me? that's just awesome!

Scribe and I have a joint Myspace page...and if any of yall want to hit us up....we would be more than happy to keep in touch....I mean who really knows where we'll end up after I join the Peace Corps of teaching..we are listed under DivaScribe.

Two thousand and six is done….

Wow!....That went quick didn’t it?

The year started out with uncertainty…I didn’t keep all of my resolutions…..and some I really really should have kept.

I’m thankful though….I get to try again in another year. 0 7….and 7 is my lucky number…

I’m staying home tonight. Just me and Scribe…and Tyrone of course….the twins are down in Memphis with my parents…visiting family and taking an extended vacation….I don’t know if they deserved it or not….but my heart was struck by the passing of James Brown…..and I thought of my grandmother and her sisters…Grandma turning 70-something in February…I know with all the planning I have to do with this move…I won’t get to see her until the summer…but at least my girls will have some time with her….

I’m lucky this year….no family members passed…Most of us are holding our heads above water…some of us moving on to bigger and better things….We have been blessed….

I don’t have to tell you about the year I been having….most of yall know….but if you are new here….just take a look at the archives….This time last year…I extricated myself out of a silly throwback romance….and it wasn’t hard. I was calm afterwards….Happy because I knew that something special was on its way…I don’t know how I knew….but I knew something was coming….

I’m glad that I had the openness in my heart to receive it.

I found love in 0 six….and I was ready for it.

0 7 should prove to be very exciting…

I have a few irons in the fire….a Plan B,C,D,and E to go with Plan A….so our relocation plans show really go well….Tune back on January 8th for an update on that.

I want to wish all my friends in the blogworld a Happy New Year….may you get all you desire in 2007 and may you and your families be blessed with abundance!

Monday, December 25, 2006

We're Engaged

Please press play above.....


DJ Diva and Scribe are engaged!

Scribe asked me to marry him and presented me with a platinum diamond ring at 12:01 Christmas morning....

I had no clue

I thought I was getting an Ipod

I got a husband!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

God is truly good!

Pray for us....we are so incredibly happy!

Merry Christmas!

Wednesday, December 20, 2006

Forsaking all others

“God will not answer your prayers because of the iniquity in your heart”

I rarely answer my cell phone when I’m home. Partly because I’m always doing something. I have two children who still need me to provide them with a clean house, good food and a proper education.

It’s also because I don’t want to hear any bullshit.

This Sunday, Scribe and I had a rare weekend off from the kids. Me and Mom mended our fences once again…trying to come to a higher level….where she recognizes that I am an adult….and where I recognize that by being her first child and only daughter…she needs to spend more time with me…..but she also needed to understand that in order for me to do that…..some things have got to change.

So I’m home doing a little overtime…..and my godmother called me.

I’ll be honest…I didn’t pick up the phone the first time she called….But when she called a second time….I picked up….

Why did I do that?

We began to talk….we haven’t spoken since her granddaughter’s party….where Scribe and my mother finally bonded over shots of Jack Daniels…..before that…it had been months…because of the same reason which I am about to explain now….

As I began to tell her all the things that had be going on in my life…the interviews….the relocation plans….finally finalizing my degree (a whole ‘nother story)…

She stopped me….and said the phrase that I highlighted above….

I was like huh? She said that because Scribe and I were living in sin…God was not and will not be answering my prayers….

Wanna know what I said?

Ha ha ha….you know Ima tell you!

I said:

You know what? I don’t discuss my relationship with my mother or anyone else in my family. I am 33 years old and at this point I don’t feel like I need validation from you or anybody else on my choice to be with this man…

She then said that I was mad at God because I didn’t want to listen to her. And she was only trying to tell me the Word and that I didn’t want to listen because I knew I was going to Hell. That God wasn’t listening to me or answering my prayers because of the sin I was committing….

What a thing to say….

I proceeded to say:

Well since you insist on discussing this…..How in the heck do you know that God isn’t listening to me? Do you know what I have prayed for and how He has answered me? This man I am in love with is an answered prayer in itself!

Of course then she came back with: that sin is pleasurable…and though it may feel good…it’s only for a season…

Ha! My retort was: You know what? You said that at the beginning of this relationship….told me it wouldn’t last and that I was giving my body up for sin…..ok…so now it has been almost 8 months…and we have been through 3 seasons….spring, summer, fall….and now winter….so just which season is it supposed to be in that this man that I love is supposed to leave me? Huh? I guess no man knoweth the day or the hour huh?

Why is it that before you began to judge me…you couldn’t first ask me about our plans…whether we had any intention on getting married….whether plans had been made….if you had asked first….you would know that plans have already been made….and I believe him…and I believe in Him….GM, you have not spent any time with us….and this is our second phone conversation in 8 months! You know nothing about our lives together….what wonderful things have already happened….the proof that I have already received from God that my life is on the right path….all you know is I’m living with a man outside of marriage…so when we get married next year…this conversation will be moot then right? Or will I be judged on the past then?

You have no right to say that God isn’t listening to me because I am sinning….Everyone sins….sin of envy, gluttony…jealousy…strife….No man is perfect….not you…not me…no one…yet you believe God answers your prayers right…even though you sin…whether it be in the flesh…or in your heart….but he can’t be answering mine right? Wrong….Even when Jesus met the woman at the well…He didn’t judge her because she was living with a man who was not her husband….He had ample time to do so….we could have had a recorded record of how He called her a harlot and where He told her to leave the man in order to receive salvation….

But He said none of that…..yet you decide that it is your duty to condemn me whenever you speak to me….I really don’t care what you think about what blessings I may or may not be getting…you don’t know what’s going on this house….so you have no clue….I thank you for sharing your experience with me (because by this point she began to tell me how she lived with child’s father and how he never married her)…But Scribe is not your ex man….and if you’ll remember I have been married before….so I’m no stranger to this sort of business….

I went on to tell her that I appreciate her calling…because I know it was out of love….misguided though it may be…..but the honest truth is…I don’t need ANYONE telling me what to do with my relationship….and I suggested that she might want to direct these kinds of calls to her own unmarried, un-working daughter…who is still being supported by her and the dude that wouldn’t marry her…

I know Scribe was listening…it was kind of hard not to…I can get pretty loud when discussing something passionately….but there was no anger…no rancor in my voice…I wasn’t trying to hurt her feelings…I mean…why should I when mine weren’t hurt? Besides…I don’t work that way….

Forsaking all others….

That’s what this relationship is based on….she wasn’t the first to speak against what I am doing…and won’t be the last…but what they don’t know is that this bond is strong between me and Scribe…stronger than a diamond…a piece of paper…and ultimately stronger than any person’s judgments.

It’s a wonderful thing when you have someone you can look forward to seeing everyday…where you are in constant discussion about your goals …together….and working toward them in tandem every single day! …like I told my sis last night :

He’s Foine, smart, well dressed, well spoken, generous…loves my children… and well hung….what the hell else do I need?


My prayers have already been answered….in an abundance!

Matter fact…let me just let Mary sing the rest….

Let’s Ride Daddy!

Tuesday, December 12, 2006

All I want for Christmas/Scribe Takeover

Hey everybody...I been crazy busy...interviewing for A.mer.ica and trying to get this move coordinated for the middle of and Scribe and the kids are out of here...and earlier than previously stated...

Can I just say that I love my man....Scribe is the absolute best man I could ever find for me and my kids....I know...I sick of hearing it....but when I had bad shit going on...that's all I talked about....

Now all I want to talk about is the joy of having found my otherself and having been with him for 7 months...but....i have another spot for that....

But I'll let Scribe takeover for today:

Call it a clan, call it a network, call it a tribe, call it a family: Whatever you call it, whoever you are, you need one.”
-Jane Howard

Its Christmas time in New York! This is my favorite time of the year here. It’s the part of New York that I’m going to miss the most when I move south (or wherever the hell says we're moving…: ). I’ve been to other cities all around the country some may be more picturesque (Colorado Springs), some more traditional (New Orleans), but I really can’t imagine any city in the union being anymore uplifting and exciting than it is here during the holidays. The best gifts in my life seem to come without any holiday or occasion. This year has sort of been the exception. On Cinco de Mayo, I met Diva in person for the first time, we dove into a Spanish Karaoke bar in the Bronx, she broke down all my insecurities in one night and life hasn’t been the same since to say the least. Her brother asked me once, how did I tame her? I gave him a lot of words but what I should have said was, “I didn’t tame her at all!”. I’ve said it once and I’ll say it again, “You simply don’t trap butterflies!” I’ve tried to make myself the most comfortable nourishing flower in the field and Diva has found me worthy enough to stay perched on...does that make sense? Seriously, Diva has been incredibly accepting of all the ish that comes with being with me. She has clearly been the best gift of all the gifts I’ve ever received in any year on any day!

Well, here it is the holiday season and for the first time in my life I have children in my life to share Christmas with. Before I get to that, I think I need to reveal that as a child my Christmas’ in a word….sucked. I’ll save you the sob story, but honestly, I rarely got anything I wanted or much at all. All I can say is that the 80’s were hard on my family. My 1st niece was born December 23, 1991 and with that came the re-birth of my Christmas spirit. I took my newborn niece everywhere I could. Everywhere Christmas was being celebrated, I wanted her to be there. Even if she could barely open her eyes…lol. Now, each holiday season, I want to hear the carols, I want to smell the cookies baking, I want to see the lights on the bushes and windows of houses, and the elaborate displays in the store windows on 5th Avenue. I want hot apple cider from Starbucks, and I absolutely must watch Miracle on 34th Street (the 1940’s version) sometime between December 1st and December 24th. I want a tree that smells like it just got chopped down and drug in from Everwood forest and a mistletoe hung over my front door. And will somebody please buy some egg nog and spike that ish for me. Is that asking too much? Yeah it is. But each year I try to get all of that in before the 25th because to me that’s tradition. I don’t know but it seems each year it becomes fashionable to hate on the holidays. I always said to myself, my kids, should I had any of my own, would remember Christmas fondly and vividly. They will take the traditions followed by their parents and share them with their own children…at least that’s what I hope happens. Is that too um….Caucasian? corny? What can I tell you…Scribe loves the kids.

So it was this past weekend that I took my girls (the twins) out ice-skating at Wollman Rink in Central Park. (Mommy DJ Diva stayed home and played Tiger Woods PGA Golf on Xbox) It was their first time ever and they loved it. I say I took them ice-skating, but really it was more “ice-falling”, the twins are big for their age and well lets just say they have the coordination of a newborn fawn. I have never in my life seen two kids have that much fun hurting themselves in my life. I tried to convince them that I didn’t want them to hurt themselves falling and that we should leave early, but they were having none of it. They did not like seeing everybody flying around the ice and they had to play the wall. They were determined to stay until they got it, and well they almost did…two more times and we’ll have two Peggy Flemings on our hands. What I love about these kids is that when they get challenged, they get mad, but the anger doesn’t stop them…it makes them more determined. They get that ..I’m sure.. from their mother…if fact I’m positive that’s where they get it from.(He's right...DJ does not accept failure!) We then trekked around the park awhile, then down 5th avenue to see the lights on the buildings, the coolest one being the one with the huge snowflakes that light up one at a time and then all together…they couldn’t stop counting the snowflakes. Finally, I busted through the throng of people and made it to Rockefeller Center to see the Christmas tree. One of them says to me, “We should take that tree home.” Everything we did that day was a first for them and that was perhaps the thing that made the day that much more special. When you see a child’s face light up with excitement and wonder….makes you proud, if not a little misty.

I’m not sure what I’m getting for Christmas, but even if I get nothing, my holiday season has been made. I shared, and continue to share this season with the three people I’m most thankful for. Diva says to me the othernight, “I hope I do enough for you.” My Love listen, you’ve given me the gift of your family and charged me with being the leader of it. That’s all a man really can ask for. Enjoy this holiday season, share it liberally with your family, cast out your inner-scrooge, and have some hot apple cider…I’m telling you the stuff is good for the soul.

Merry Christmas! Enjoy!

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