Wednesday, February 14, 2007

Our First Valentine's Day

Today....after 9 months of pure love....It's Valentine's Day.....

I haven't been too into the holiday in years.....but this year I really understood what a love gift meant....

God really must love me....He gave me a wonderful present last year...well in advance of this day....no flowers to die....no chocolates to melt....no diamonds to chip....but a wonderful man to love and take care of me....and in this last week it has really been through "in sickness and in health"!

I demanded that Scribe not buy me one thing....and I meant it.

This was not a day that he needed to prove anything to me at all. He has already done that and there couldn't possibly be anything to give back to him in return. I'm so lucky that he thinks my love is enough. I'm thankful that I have so much to give him.

But of course we had to get each other something. In the last few days we've been sneaking around town....trying to find the best cards we could for each other....with all of the posts we written about loving one another....it was difficult to find a card that expressed what we felt....

But without further ado...I present...

Scribe and Diva's First Cards.... (break out the tissue LOL)

First up?

Diva:

For My Sweet Valentine

You tease me with your eyes
and thrill me with your kisses,
Impress me with your mind,
remind me life is bliss
You serenade my ears
with your sweet talk on the phone
and leave me softly sighing
at the scent of your cologne

You fill my world with color
even when the weather's gray
and have me smiling secret smiles
with thoughts of you
all day

You move me and you groove me
I can't help but let it show
Sweet baby, I'm so into you
(As if you didn't already know)

Happy Valentine's Day

and now from my Daddy

With you is my favorite place to be

whenever i am in your arms

i'm in my favorite place

and when i gaze into your eyes,

i see my best friend's face

without you near to share my life

i don't know what i'd do....

cause every day i find myself

much more in love with you.

Happy Valentine's Day


I cried with I got mine....to me it was so special.....I asked for permission to post them...and he said yes....So while he's drawing my nightly bath...which he does every night and not just because it's V Day.....I decided to share a portion of my gift with you guys....

I hope you had a good day too.

Friday, February 09, 2007

3 Quotes

I know it must be a Culture Shock….”

Daddy sent you a letter but it came back”

“I guess I wasn’t your fairy tale”

Yesterday I received three phone calls from outside of Memphis…those are direct quotes from each conversation….

Shall I discuss? LOL

Of course!

“I know it must be a Culture Shock….”

One of my very best friends in the whole world called me yesterday…T…I felt horrible because I hadn’t given her a call or held some type of goodbye get together when I left…It became absolutely necessary for me to leave quickly because there were a lot of things that needed my help with my parent’s business and my grandmother…But as we chatted I began to tell her how life was different….As I was talking to her….I had returned from an interview…and was picking up the little bits of paper and stuff out of the yard….We live on a corner plot on a major street….and well…people who throw trash out of their cars while driving….I’m fussing because it really was minor….but now that this is my shit? I get to fuss…And yes it is mine. Anything happens to my parents God forbid…I am the one who has to manage it and give a portion to my brothers. It’s a good money maker too. We currently rent 6 rooms for ___ on the top 2 floors…..Scribe and I have the bottom floor…and we share only the use of the kitchen…and these tenants only cook once a week. So it’s never a problem…..

So as I talked to her about my experiences…..one thing kept coming up….

I need to slow down…

I was walking into a store and a girl yelled out behind me…”Miss you sure walk fassssst”

I was shocked because I was actually moving at my normal rate. I wasn’t even hurrying. But when I looked around …there was no one moving around even a quarter as fast….Someone during a different incident told me to slow down…..I have frustrated the cable people, phone people and electricians with my incessant questions but my whole deal is….listen…just answer the questions I ask you and skip the back story plueaseeeee!!

Yeah…it’s been a culture shock.

“Daddy sent you a letter but it came back”

As I was driving back from C’s house…to drop off another part for the car I am supposed to be driving…once her brother fixes it….I received an incoming call from the twins’ fathers…yeah I know…who? I spoke to him before we left…2 weeks before in fact…once I knew the date we were leaving….When he called then…The twins told him we were moving and he said to my taty…..”Oh, now you guys are 6 hours away and your mom can drive 3 hours and I can drive three hours to come and get you”

Nigga what? Nigga who?

You kidding me right? Me? After 5 years of free pickup and delivery service in NY? And you owe me approximately $4000 in back child support? He switched jobs to avoid detection by the court order….as he normally does once a year….Also after the fact I had to get the twins to Memphis to see him and Scribe had to foot their airline ticket back in the summer?

I promptly let him know that I had no intention on driving them down the block to see him. Then I asked him about my money. Not that I need it….but if you gonna ask me some stupid shit…I figured I would reciprocate by doing the same! He got hot and hung up quickly….so when I saw his number pop on my phone for the first time in a month to call his daughters….I ignored it.

And didn’t fell bad about it at all

Then he sent a text message…with the above quote….well my response?

“you sending letters? How about sending some funds!”

Basically…Negro…send my damn money!


Whatever…

Last quote…and I did save the best for last….

I guess I wasn’t your fairy tale”

The Lion…aka one of the “Hello it’s me” Negroes….happened to call on this driving trip to C’s as well…I was alone because Scribe was at the house waiting for an electrician…long story…I’m sure he’s already posted about it…or is about to…

Anyway…I see a 646 number pop up and I’m like hmmm…could be one of my brothers….I answer and at first I didn’t recognize the voice…..it has been six months since he called last…and before that it was about another 6 months….see that’s how the “Hello it’s me” Negroes do…..as Scribe says…”they wait for you to forget why you dumped them”…I say they wait for that and hope for desperation!

Although The Lion and I have a long history ( 21 years) of friendship? and relationship?…..I had given up after our last 2 year bout with the on and offs….And it was after I had truly given him up….I mean really just said this will never work and deleted him from my phone and my heart….After I went ahead and buried the unspoken promises that would never be spoken out loud…that I truly met the man of my dreams….To make it short….I had to be free when I met Scribe…in order to truly receive him with all of me….Which I did…but back to the phone call

So once I established the Caller….Lion….He of course got upset that I didn’t recognize his voice (I didn’t the last time negro either!)….I had to drop the bomb on him early…..He starts talking about how he’s at my favorite place in NY (and it wasn't my fav place) and he’s about to screen this movie he and his boy made…and how being there made him think of me and so he had to call blah blah blah………

I stopped him and said “That’s nice, but I’m in Memphis. I relocated two weeks ago”

He was like what? And how come you didn’t call? And xyz….

I told him there was really no reason to because something else happened as well…I let him know that I was engaged and planning to get married very soon…He was like “Oh, the dude moved with you to Memphis??????…He thought that it was all sudden and I said:

“well you know Lion, it may seem fast….but we aren’t 14 anymore…when you know what you want and you get it…there is no time constraints…I have finally found my fairytale and it’s really happening for me…This man is wonderful…he is soo good to me…and even better to my kids….what more could I ask for…I am very happy and he’s it for me…I never knew love could be like this…well I guess I knew….but this time instead of writing about it…I have it!”

“well I guess I wasn’t your fairytale then…I have to keep on searching for mine”

“Yeah Lion…keep looking…I’m sure you will find her one day…I mean I did….so I hope you do too”

There was a lot of silence on the phone…I did the 5 sec rule and then began to say hello hello LOL….he was there and he started to speak about his project and we hung up….

Ladies and Gentlemen…that felt good as hell….I’m sure you know why….The Lion really believed that somehow I would always be there…while he constantly searched for his “ideal”…and chased his pipe dreams…that Diva would be patiently waiting for him to return…he never expected me to actually find happiness without him. He wasn’t the one for me. I realized that a year ago and it was made even more true when I met Scribe.

Scribe and I work so well together…we don’t hide anything…we give each other full trust….we talk about everything and I mean everything. Scribe is my best friend and would never even do one of the things The Lion did to me. I know that. I know it for myself as they say in church.

What I get from Scribe is real love…the kind Mary sang about….sometimes it’s romantic love, sometimes it’s funny love …hell sometimes it’s Honey Love..LOL….occasionally it’s Tough Love….but it’s always Love…no scheming…no thinking about reciprocation…he just gives his all…and I do too…

So yeah…it’s been a culture shock…and all of my mail has been forwarded…so that I can continue with my fairytale…..This is my new life…

Sorry the post was so long….but depending on my electrical problems…who knows when I can post again…but that’s why I came down here…to help fix problems….

Have a good weekend!

Sunday, February 04, 2007

Far Away from here

"Far away from here
far away from here
far away from here
just jump in a taxicab
pack a bag
and get away fast
"-Kindred


Memphis.

I have finally separated from what I thought were my roots in New York City and took a plunge into the unknown yet familiar. It has been seven days since Scribe and I packed a van and drove down to relocate our family.

Am I happy? What? Are you kidding me?

Yes..I am. I am very happy.

There are no neighbors. No loud talking chickenheads (yes now I can speak freely since I moved! LOL)…sitting on the stoop…or throwing their men out of the house.

My children are still in NY. That bothers me a lot. A week is really too long to be without them. Yet there had to be some adjusting so it actually worked out better.

Scribe is happy. We live in a very beautiful house with parquet flooring. Rent free courtesy of my parents. For as long as we want to stay here.

Which for him won’t be too long. LOL …My fiancé is a complex man whose ideals far surpass my dreams of how a man should take care of his family. The amount of pressure he has put on himself this last week consistently made me alternate between, fussing with him, pleading with him and large bouts of inner pride. We have enough to tide us over financially for a while so pressure really isn’t needed.

Speaking of fiancé….

My grandmother lives down here. Grandma Diva is also very complex. Until she met him she insisted on calling him my friend. Earlier this week I had an opportunity to tell her that she should probably start calling him my fiancé since he got me a ring LOL. She laughed too and continues to refer to him as “your friend”.

Until she met him.

My grandmother took one look at Scribe's handsome face and promptly fell in love! LOL

He was respectful and talkative with her….and she ate it up…

So much so that she told him to call her if I acted up. Which I do a lot of. Scribe has mucho patience.

She thought my ring was beautiful and commented on the high quality of the diamond.

Later after we left, she called to tell me :

“Oooh Diva, he’s handsome. I believe he looks better than your ex-husband. Smarter too. Diva I think you done really hit the jackpot!”

I was happy to hear it. Somehow…throughout all of the drama ….my family has fully accepted Scribe and now regard him as a family member. My mother would now rather give Scribe instructions on the house maintenance instead of me. LOL

They believe in our love and what we are trying to accomplish and that means a lot. So much.

Grandma offered the use of her expansive backyard for our wedding reception. My cousin…the assistant Pastor of her church offered to officiate the wedding…

I am hereby making a public plea for Nikki of Infinite Ink to do my wedding pictures LOL (terms to be discussed of course!)

May 5th. Cinco De Mayo. The day I saw my love for the first time. A year to the day I will be named Mrs. Scribe.

Can’t wait!

So far so good in Memphis. With two job interviews next Tuesday with two very good companies and more certainly to follow….I am extremely happy to be here!

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