Thursday, September 01, 2005

I'm Hurtin', I'm Sad and I'm Mad

I'm fucking heated. I'm watching them let my people die down there in New Orleans and I want to hurt somebody. The people are dying down there and this fucking government is letting them suffer. I don't talk alot about race and heavy topics like that. Anything I say could be misinterpreted by anyone. That's why I love writing. What's said is on paper.

But this has elevated my stress like crazy. I can't eat. I can't sleep. I can't focus in class. I had to write it out to even stop thinking about it. I was chatting with Grayse yesterday. We agreed that now is the time when we need our troops home. Who better to help out in an emergency like this? The young and able men of our country. Who are dying over there in Iraq. It's so retarded. I mean, what's really going on here? Right Spike? I can't seem to stop talking about it. Sassywow and I have been on constant IM. Even my baby Bro and I watch the news together in our respective homes..I'm stressed out.

I wanna do something. I have nothing but my prayers and a budgeted donation. My hands feel so tied. My people are dying and I can't help. I can write about how angry I was when I saw the difference between the captions as Fresh pointed out in Crunk. I mean really...Everybody would be going to grab some sustenance. I don't know about the brother carrying the TV...or the woman with the shopping cart full of purses that I saw on CNN. But why White folks "find" and Black folks "loot". It makes me so angry. Why are my people stuck in their projects...gathered in the streets...and all they want to show me are some fools running into Walmart?
Finally, I'm seeing them show images from the Convention Center. The government ain't got shit to say so far about those people. There are some good things going on with San Antonio opening up their Dome. But who wants to live in a football dome for months? We have a real crisis on our hands. And I'm scared. I read blogs about people who have had to double up their homes, like Serenity 23 and I feel for them. I wept and prayed for those that couldn't be found like Nikki and Diggs. And I shouted with joy when they were reported safe. I have begun to love my blog family. Lord, I can even fathom how Jamal and EJ must feel. And all the others that I don't even know about.

This hurts. And I hurt for all of you. I just wanted to write that. And I'm so sad. And very Mad!

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