Mommie Dearest

I’m feeling productive today. So I shouldn’t be sitting in front of my laptop LOL

I want to talk about mothers. I have too many mothers in my life. My mommy, two grandmommies, a god-mommy, a church mommy and a mommy in law.


Jeez..that’s too much mothering for one person to have.

Do you know how much time needs to be invested in all these mothers? Think about when you don’t call your mother…or go see her? She has your behind for breakfast with a phone call at six in the morning out of the blue…alternating between cursing you out and moaning about why you don’t love her…And why the hell must they call you at the crack of dawn?

I use the excuse of school to make up for the once a week phone call…except to my own mommy of course lol.

But when you talk to your mommy…what do they want to hear?

Me: “Well, (insert mommy here) work is going well. The twins are fine. School is great. Do you want to hear about the last paper I wrote? I got a A-…I was mad but…”

(insert various mommy here) : “No…I want to hear about this man you dating”

Pause

Brain Scream: Nah man. I ain’t talking about him! I can’t yet…No info! Blah! I ain’t f-ing with yall…I know how u mommies do…Today he’s an Adonis in my eyes…after a phone call with you picking him apart… he’ll be worse than Leroy down the block. I know how all yall mommies get down.

Me: “Oh he’s nice.”

HA!

Today’s situation is about my mommy in law. I’m divorced but we still maintain a relationship. I have the only two grandchildren that she has known and I have made considerable effort to stay in touch with her. In fact, I have made more trips to take them to see her than her own son has. I love my grandmas…so I really want the twins to know theirs too. I mean the twins are really blessed to have them and great grandmothers to talk to.

My problem is she always wants me to spend the night when the twins do. I can’t do it. I don’t feel right. He’s remarried and I just feel like it would be insulting to the new wife. I also know I couldn’t stomach it. I would have to sleep either in his room, which still reeks of his acidic odor…or in the livingroom with pictures of Magilla Gorilla. Nah…I’m soooo good. Miss Rose wants pics of me too…But I didn’t want to make MG feel bad.

So today I had to tell Miss Rose again (at six oclock in the damn morning) …that I wasn’t going to spend the night. In six years I haven’t….why keep asking? And besides…the twins going to spend the night out is just great…a break for me. I know it may sound harsh…but sometimes even me and the twin divas need a break from each other. I don’t do sleepovers. Well…u know…

But now that her son has moved to Atlanta..... And she is here all alone, with just me about 40 miles away…I feel guilty…Like maybe I should be there for her. She has always loved me from day one. Begged for three years for us to reconcile….I feel a little bad.

But I have to be firm…No spending the night. But I will be in Brooklyn early again tomorrow to drive her shopping and to go to IHOP.

That’s enough…right? Yeesh...